The Fifth Marauder
by PolarBearMagus
Summary: Lily finds out about the Marauders, and trouble with her friends forces her to ask James for help. Yeah, bad summary, but please R&R!
1. Suspicion

A/N: So, I wanted to write another fanfic. This is an idea I've been playing with for a while, long before Harry Potter and the Lost Island. If people like it, I can finish it up in a few chapters. By the way, I have no clue how the Marauders meet up to go on adventures. But since it's not that important to the plot, I just made it simple. I know it's very unlikely that it happened this way, but I like it all the same. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Oh, I don't own Harry Potter or anything related to it, but that doesn't surprise anyone here does it?

* * *

"Hey, Prongs, wait up!"

Lily glared at Black as he pushed past her to catch up to Potter. They weren't the only ones heading to lunch, why did they have to take up the whole hallway? Lupin and Pettigrew followed their friends, but at least had the courtesy to go around her.

She sighed in exasperation and tried to reenter the conversation she was having with her friends. Were they talking about potions class?

"I can't wait for tonight!" Black exclaimed. He walked backwards so he could face his friends. "Can't we speed time up or something?"

"Why would you want to do that?" asked Pettigrew. "We have a Charms exam in an hour."

"Don't be so thick, Wormtail," Potter said. "That's not what he meant." He glanced around the courtyard they were entering. Lily figured that he was looking for first-years to terrorize. She made sure to stay out of his line of sight. She wasn't following them, they were all headed to the same class, so it didn't matter if she was behind them and able to hear their conversation. Right?

What did Black mean? There wasn't anything special about today. No feasts, no parties, no Quidditch matches, nothing.

"We need to be careful," Lupin said. "We can't afford any more close calls. Last time – "

"Last time was a fluke," Black interrupted him. "There's no way it could happen again. Besides, who's going to know it was us?"

Last time? she thought, not even pretending to be interested in her friends' conversation any more. What last time?

But a crowd of third-years merged with her line outside the Great Hall, and she could no longer hear what they were saying. Potter and his friends found a spot at the Gryffindor table, laughing at some joke one of them made, while she followed her own friends to a spot further down. What were those four up to? she wondered. Breaking school rules? Probably. Doing something extremely dangerous? Most likely. Should she follow them? No, all of her Head Girl instincts screamed at her. But she was going to.

* * *

Later that evening, Lily was immersed in her Standard Book of Spells. Or at least, she was pretending to be immersed. She was really watching Potter and his friends play Exploding Snap, waiting for them to make their move. It was only an hour or so after dinner, and the common room was more crowded than usual.

The cards exploded, and she jumped.

"Well, that was a good game," she heard Lupin say. "What time is it?"

"Time to get started on our homework," Potter said. "I'll clean this up. You lot head to the library."

"We can help you, mate," Black offered.

Potter gave him a meaningful look, then glanced over at…her! Lily dropped her eyes quickly and turned her page, looking for all the world like she was engrossed in learning the procedure to turn a pair of scissors into a rabbit. Did they know she was on to them?

"All right," Black was saying. "We'll save you a seat. But don't take your time with it." He, Lupin, and Pettigrew grabbed their book bags and left the common room. She didn't dare look up. Potter was probably still clearing off the table. But she couldn't tell if he was still there. She needed to know. If he was gone, she would have to leave quickly before she lost them.

She glanced up and jumped again. Potter was standing behind her armchair, watching her. "Hey Evans," he said as she tried to compose herself.

"Potter," she acknowledged, then tried to go back to her book.

"Studying?" he asked with a smirk.

"Trying to," she said, with her own meaningful look. Smile all you want, she thought. I'm going to catch you breaking the rules, maybe even a few laws. Then what will Dumbledore say about making you Head Boy? God, those brown eyes were mesmerizing…

"You don't really want to study right now, do you?"

She could feel her face reddening slightly, as if he'd read her thoughts. "Don't you?" she asked, trying to keep her gaze level.

"Nope," he admitted. "But my friends are waiting for me. If I don't hurry up they'll start behaving like animals." He grinned, and started for the portrait door.

"How would that be any different than normal?" she challenged him. He turned around, smile still in place, then left the common room without another word. As soon as the door slammed shut, she leaped up.

"Lily?" her friends cried, but she was gone before they had fully registered that she was out of her chair.

Lily flattened herself against the corridor wall. Potter was practically running down the stairs. She waited for him to reach the bottom before heading down herself, the back of her mind noting with satisfaction that this was _not_ the way to the library.

She followed him down several passages, always sure to remain far enough back that he wouldn't see her. Where was he going? As she turned another corner, she saw the Entrance Hall and immediately ducked back out of sight. Black, Lupin, and Pettigrew were standing there, waiting for Potter. But she hadn't seen Potter. What was going on? She chanced another look around her corner, and saw that Black was missing too. Where did he go? she thought in alarm. He was just there! But as she watched, Lupin and Pettigrew walked forward and disappeared, almost as if they were walking behind an…

Invisibility cloak! She gasped. Where did they get one of those? Had they stolen it? More importantly, how was she going to follow them if they were invisible?

One of the Entrance Hall doors opened and closed of its own accord. Aha! She thought. She glanced around the hall before racing to the doors and slipping through herself.

Lily rolled her eyes. The boys were barely lowering their voices. What was the point of being invisible if they were so _loud_? She started to follow their voices, then realized that they would see her if they turned around. She needed to be able to keep tabs on them without them noticing her.

A broom! They would never think to look up! She quickly summoned a broom from the Quidditch shed. Hurry up, she thought, they're getting away. If they kept going in a straight line, they'd end up in the Forbidden Forest. Why were they going there? she wondered. She was proud that she had never been in the Forest before. Well, she amended, classes didn't count. Neither did the time that –

She was interrupted in her thoughts by the arrival of her broom. As her hand closed over the splintered handle, she groaned. This was one of the older brooms, a Shooting Star by the looks of it, although its label had been worn off over the years. She hoped it would hold itself together long enough for her to figure out what Potter and his friends were doing.

Lily kicked off from the ground. The broom dipped sharply, but she pulled up with all of her strength until she was above the distant tree line. She breathed a sigh of relief, then urged her broom to a greater speed. Soon she was over the Forest. Keeping a tight grip on the handle, which was fighting her to go lower, she scanned the ground. Would they still be under the cloak? She didn't think so, now that they were hidden by the Forest itself.

A strong gust of wind from the left knocked into her, pushing the broom into a jerky dance. She had to fight just to keep her balance, let alone keep the broom from snapping in two.

A howl arose from the Forest to her right. She gasped and pulled away instinctively, forgetting that she was already off balance. For a few seconds the broom was sweeping out an arc on the sky, and then she was falling. She screamed as she entered the Forest and the trees clawed at her as she fell. She snatched at branches, but the few she found snapped off, only slightly slowing her descent.

The ground slammed into her, ramming the breath from her lungs. She inhaled sharply, acutely aware of the fact that a piece of the Shooting Star was wedged under her back. Using a tree trunk to hold her weight, she slowly lifted herself up into a standing position. She whipped her wand out, thankful that at least _that_ hadn't broken.

Screw Potter. She was getting out of here, and fast. She looked around anxiously. If only she knew which way was out. Taking a deep breath, she started off in one direction.

Another howl, closer than the first, seemed to come from right in front of her. Her eyes widened, and the next instant she was running in the opposite direction.

Her lung felt like there was a giant splinter in it, digging deeper with every breath. But she didn't want to stop in case that howling thing was after her. Right on cue it howled again, and seemed to be right next to her. Now she really panicked.

Lily tripped on a tree root, and she somersaulted across the forest floor. She scrambled up, but had to lean against a tree for support, her breathing was ragged. Her wand wavered in front of her, spells leaving her mind like water cupped in her hands.

She heard it growling before she saw it. It was tearing through the forest, and as it topped a rise, she recognized it from pictures in her Defense Against the Dark Arts class.

"A werewolf," she whispered to herself, as if categorizing it would help her fight it. She tensed, a stunning spell on the tip of her tongue. She would wait as long as possible so she would be sure to hit it. It was only a few meters away when she shouted "_Stupefy!_" To her horror, the werewolf dodged the red beam of light easily.

A dark blur raced in from her left and collided with the werewolf. She didn't stay to see the outcome of the battle, but bolted in the opposite direction. She could hear barking from behind her, but this only urged her to go faster.

Why oh why had she followed them? she asked herself as she ran. She should have stayed in the common room. The nice, safe common room.

She yelped in surprise when she saw a deer jump over some bushes in front of her. A stag, she corrected herself, staring at the antlers. She turned to run, but the stag cut her off. Confused and scared, she turned again, but he blocked her.

Lily wanted to glance behind her to see if the werewolf was chasing her, but for some reason she felt that even if Voldemort himself had been standing behind her, she wouldn't be able to pull her gaze from the stag's.

The stag bent down on one knee, as a horse would to allow a rider onto its back. Her eyes traveled back to the antlers. Suddenly, all of the hints and jokes made sense, as if the last puzzle piece had finally slipped into place, and she shivered in realization. She looked the stag in the eye.

"_Prongs_?"


	2. Fight and Flight

"Potter, is that really you?" she asked.

The stag nodded, then waved its head back. Lily didn't need any more encouragement. She climbed on, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. As Potter took off, she heard the werewolf howl again. She tensed, then quickly released the pressure. She didn't want to choke him.

It took all of her concentration to keep from falling off. This was nothing like flying. It was jolting, with too many bounds as James leaped over brush.

"Unbelievable," she whispered. Potter was an animagus. The others probably were too. But she didn't have time to contemplate this new discovery. She could still hear the werewolf behind them. Her fingers were wrapped around her wand so hard the knuckles were white.

They emerged from the Forbidden Forest. She surprised to see that they were further from the castle than before. She must have been running in the wrong direction. A branch snapped near the edge of the forest. She glanced back, and gasped as the werewolf charged out from beneath the trees, bearing down on them now that they were in the open.

"Potter, you have to go faster!" she told him. "He's gaining on us!"

He couldn't answer, but she felt him lengthen his stride. The ground raced by even faster. She didn't want to think about what would happen if she fell off. She tightened her grip, and shot a stun spell over her shoulder.

The werewolf growled, but dodged it just as easily as before. She took careful aim, then fired another one. It was even farther off target, and the werewolf was gaining.

Potter wavered, and Lily was shocked to find that he was slowing down. He must not have ever run this far before, especially not with a human on his back. "No, James, don't give up!" she cried. "We're almost there, you can make it! Just a bit farther!" But he was having trouble breathing. He wouldn't last much longer.

Lily looked back to find that the werewolf was almost alongside of them. He snapped at James' heels. As he grinned, she saw every single one of his teeth as if she were looking at a close up photograph.

She screamed, more out of anger than actual fright, as she fired another stun spell. It hit the werewolf right in the side. He only faltered for a second, but it was enough for James to pull away and for a large black dog to slam into it from the side.

She tore her eyes away from the battle. The castle was just ahead. James was barely galloping, and he stopped abruptly at the steps. She slid off and raced for the door, managing to pull it open before she realized that James hadn't followed her. "James?" she called, looking around.

He had collapsed at the bottom of the steps, and reverted to his human form. She tripped down the steps and knelt by him, shaking him slightly. "Come on James, we have to go inside." When he didn't respond, she began to pull him up the steps, panic starting to build in her chest as she watched the battle out of the corner of her eye.

She slipped a few times, but was only halfway there when the dog yelped in pain. She looked up involuntarily. The dog was lying in the grass, motionless, and the werewolf was headed for the castle.

Lily pulled James faster, determined to get inside before the werewolf reached them. She slipped again, and started half crawling up the steps. It was almost here. She opened the door wider. It reached the bottom of the steps. She pulled James through the doorway and slammed the door shut. Almost immediately the werewolf rammed into the door, but she breathed a sigh of relief. It couldn't get in here. Hogwarts was safe.

For the first time she noticed that she was covered in scrapes and cuts, probably from her fall through the trees. But they didn't matter right now.

She knelt down by James again. "Are you all right?" she whispered, but he was unconscious. She reached out a hand to move his hair off of his face, and realized that she was trembling.

The werewolf rammed into the door again.

"What's going on?" someone shouted.

Lily twisted around. A soft circle of light reflected on the walls was moving down the stairs. Filch, she realized with a frown. Compared to what was outside, she definitely felt that she could handle him.

There was a closet not too far from the doors. She pulled James over and pushed him inside, then stepped in herself. She didn't close the door the whole way, just in case it locked automatically.

She listened as Filch tramped down the stairs and crossed to the doors. As he opened them, she had a flash of an image of a werewolf loose in the school, but the image quickly vanished as Filch harrumphed and shut the door again. "It's nothing, my sweet," he told the kitten that followed him everywhere these days, who for some reason was named Mrs. Norris. "Probably just those nasty students playing tricks again."

And then he was gone. Lily breathed a sigh of relief, then turned back to James. He looked terrible, from what little she could see of him. If he didn't wake up soon she was going to have to take him to the infirmary. Luckily the nurse didn't ask too many questions.

An animagus, she thought. Incredible!


	3. Healing?

A/N: Thanks to my reviewers, I really appreciate it! This is a transitional chapter, but it'll get more interesting in the next one. Oh, and most of it is from James' point of view. Enjoy!

* * *

James was too sore to move. He could just barely turn his head. He was in the infirmary, that much was obvious. But how had he gotten there? He looked left. Remus was in the bed next to his, and he was still out. He remembered that he had been running away from the transformed Remus. But why? Werewolves couldn't hurt him when he wasn't human. He looked right. Then did a double take.

Lily Evans was asleep. Not just in a chair, but in a chair pulled close to his bed, with her head resting on the mattress and her hand not quite touching his. From the looks of things, she had been there all night. His breath caught in his chest. He had been carrying her to safety. She didn't look hurt, so it must have worked. And now she was concerned about him, she wanted to know that he was okay.

Suddenly he was full of energy. He wanted to leap about the room, or congratulate all of his fellow students on a job well done, what for, he didn't really know. He just needed to do something.

Then again, if he got up, it would disturb Lily, maybe even wake her. Then she would be embarrassed and leave as quickly as possible.

He settled for moving his hand closer to hers until they touched.

"Prongs!" Sirius called from the infirmary doorway. "Moony, wake up, we're here to see you." He strolled in, with Peter right behind him.

"Go away," Remus groaned, pulling his pillow onto his face. So he hadn't been asleep after all.

"Sirius, keep your voice down!" James said, motioning with his free hand to Lily. Sirius stopped in his tracks.

"What's she doing here?"

"No clue. What was she doing in the Forbidden Forest last night?"

"I told you she'd follow us," Remus said from the depths of his pillow.

"No you didn't," Peter corrected him.

"But I told you something would happen."

James examined his best mate's face. There were several deep cuts. "Did you get those checked out?"

"What? Oh yeah, I was in here earlier. They're healing. Slowly." He pulled up another chair and sat between James and Remus.

"You still haven't answered my question," he accused James.

"Yes I did, I said I didn't know."

"You lied. Why's she here?"

"I think she _brought_ me here."

"I think so too," Remus added, having finally removed the pillow. "She was here when I came in."

"Yes, but it doesn't explain why she's _still_ here," Sirius emphasized.

"Why does it matter?" Peter asked.

"It doesn't," Remus complained. "Wake me up when we talk about something useful."

"Why did she follow us?" James asked before Sirius could ask his question again.

"I've been thinking about that," Sirius said, rocking back so that his chair was on two legs. "It could be, that _someone_, and I won't mention names here, but _someone_ tipped her off while they were having their little chat back in the common room."

Remus and Peter looked to James for an explanation, but he was saved from answering by Madam Pomfrey.

"Shouldn't the two of you be in class?" she asked of Sirius and Peter.

"We were," said Peter.

"Professor McGonagall sent me back," Sirius took over. "The poultice doesn't seem to be working." He pointed to the cuts on his face.

"Well, it would work if I knew what did that to you." She sighed in exasperation and beckoned him over to her workstation.

"I told you," Sirius said with a grin on his face as he sauntered over, "there was this huge dragon, he'd kidnapped my sister, and-"

"Spare me," she said, but she couldn't prevent the smile that spread across her face.

James looked back at Lily. Peter shuffled over worriedly. "Is she…" He hesitated. "Is she going to tell?"

Remus blanched. "She can't!"

Lily's eyelids fluttered, then snapped open. She started. When her eyes met James she breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, you're all right!" she cried. "You all are!" she added as she scanned the others. "I was so worried." She glanced down and noticed that she had grabbed James' hand. She quickly released it and sat back in her chair. She could feel the tension in the room, but she couldn't identify the source of it.

"Lily," said James, waiting for her to meet his eyes again. "We need to talk."

Her eyes widened and she jumped up. "Oh no, I'm late for class! McGonagall's going to have my head." She darted to the door. "I'll see you later, get well soon," she called back from the corridor, trying to erase the image of James' crestfallen face from her mind.


	4. Flip of the Coin

James spotted her in the fourth-floor hallway. She was with her friends, and that posed something of a problem. As far as the rest of the school knew, she was not on speaking terms with him, or if she was, it was barely civil. But if the school knew more than that, he was in big trouble.

He took a deep breath before plunging into the crowd. "Hey, Evans," he said.

She turned around and surveyed him coolly. "Hey, Potter." Her friends stifled giggles. He glared at them before continuing.

"Listen, can we talk? McGonagall wants us to pull all the prefects aside later to explain the new security measures."

"Looks like you just talked," one of Lily's blonde friends told him.

Lily shot her own withering look at her friend. "I'm coming," she said, and pushed her way out of the group. He led her away from the traffic in the hallway, but stayed just within sight of the suspicious friends.

"About last night –"

"Crap. I was hoping it _was_ about new security measures," she said, smiling to take the edge off her words.

His stomach flip-flopped, but he plowed on. "You can't…Don't tell anyone about it," he said, trying to put a bit of authority in his voice.

"Why? Afraid they'll lock you in Azkaban?" she asked, crossing her arms.

Yes, he thought. "No, not for me, or even Sirius or Peter. We're just a bonus. It's just that, when everyone finds out Remus is…" he trailed off.

She bit her lip, then nodded. "Yeah, I see what you mean. Don't worry," she assured him. "I wasn't going to tell anyway."

"Really?" he asked, genuinely surprised. "I thought it would be your duty to report any rule-breaking."

"You saved my life," she said simply.

"Well, you saved mine. So, we're even."

She didn't seem convinced. "Sirius saved me too. Maybe even Peter. I still owe _them_." She smiled. "Don't worry," she repeated. "I'm not telling anyone. Probably a mistake, but still. I think the three of you are very brave for," she waved a hand toward the forest, "whatever it is you do exactly. So, unless there's something else, I'd better get back."

He opened his mouth, but she had already turned around. As she walked away with her friends, he said, "Nope, didn't have anything else to add."

* * *

A few days later he was running late to Charms. He apologized to Professor Flitwick, then headed toward the back where the others were sitting, and was surprised to find that Lily was sitting a few seats over. He glanced back up at the front of the room, where she usually sat, and was met with several icy stares from her friends.

Confused, he reached his seat just as Flitwick began the lecture. He regarded Lily for a few moments. Head bowed so that her red hair blocked her blotchy face and puffy eyes, he knew that she had definitely been crying.

He checked to make sure that Flitwick's back was turned, then scribbled a note to Sirius.

_What's wrong with her?_

_Don't know_, Sirius replied. He didn't have to ask who "her" referred to.

James started to write, _Do you think she's –_ but stopped when he noticed that Remus was writing his own note. He passed it to Sirius, who replied, and then Remus rolled his eyes.

He scratched out the half-finished sentence and wrote instead, _What'd he say?_

_He asked is this about Lily, and I said yes_. _Now pay attention, I don't feel like taking notes today_.

_Notes as in lecture notes or notes as in our notes?_

_Both_. James bit back a laugh. He began to copy what was on the board, but he just couldn't seem to focus. He spent more time watching Lily than Flitwick's wand movements, and he figured he'd regret it later, but he couldn't help himself.

After class, Lily rushed out the door before anyone had really left their seats, leaving him even more confused.

"Do you think that'll be on the N.E.W.T.'s?" Peter asked as they filed past the other desks.

"Considering this is a N.E.W.T. class?" asked Remus. "Yeah."

"Then I'm in real trouble," said James with a laugh as they walked through the door, but he stopped abruptly when he saw Lily. She had been waiting outside, but no one else seemed to have noticed her.

"Can I talk to you?" she asked, hugging her books to her chest. She looked like she was about to cry again.

"Yeah, sure," he said without any hesitation. "I'll catch up with you later," he told the others, and they went on ahead, discussing the N.E.W.T.'s.

"Do you want some water or anything?" he asked as they walked in the other direction.

She shook her head. They walked on in silence for a few more minutes.

"Do you think I'm bossy?" she asked suddenly.

"What? No –"

"Or that I'm a know-it-all?" she continued. "Or that I've become power hungry as Head Girl? That I'd turn in my best friends if I thought it would mean that Gryffindor would win the House Cup?" Her voice wavered.

"No!" he exclaimed. "Where did you get such an idea?"

"My friends," she sobbed, breaking down again. James was torn between helplessness and thoughts of revenge, but settled for leading her to a step and sitting down next to her while she cried herself out.

"Sorry," she sniffed, using her robe to wipe her face dry. "I – hate it when – I cry," she said, her breath hitching every few words.

"Don't worry about it," he said, not sure what else to say. He rumpled his hair nervously. "Do…do all of your…friends feel this way?"

She nodded, then quickly swiped at her face with her robe.

"Why don't you hang out with me and the gang?" he suggested. "At least until they wise up."

"You mean it?" she asked.

"Yeah. We'll make 'em so jealous they'll be begging for you to come back." He smiled in reassurance.

Lily thought about it. He didn't want to push her. After all, this was only their third real conversation. She'd said she'd hated him. And yet, she was asking _him_ for help. He glowed when he saw a spark return to her eyes.

"Yes. That might work," she allowed. "But no one will believe that we're just suddenly friends. We need an explanation."

"And I assume that you have one?"

She nodded. "We could start going out."

"What?" he asked, trying to remain calm, but his insides were going haywire. He couldn't possibly be dreaming, could he?

"You've been asking me for years. It would make sense that I just got so sick of it I caved and agreed."

James wondered if it would be possible for him to fly without a broomstick right now. "Lily, this is…this is so –"

"Of course," she continued hurriedly, "we wouldn't _actually _be dating. Just pretend. To explain why I'm suddenly hanging out with you guys."

His wings were ripped away from him, and he plummeted back to the ground. "Right," he said. "I understand. Pretend."

"So you'll help me?" she asked.

He mentally kicked himself. He knew his answer, of course he knew his answer. What he was kicking himself for was that he knew that this was as close as he was ever going to be to her, to pretend to date her for a few weeks, maybe months if he was lucky, and that he was only deceiving himself by thinking that this was the real deal. As soon as this rift between her and her friends was mended, she would be gone again, and he'd be even more miserable than before, but he couldn't stop himself from moving closer all the same.

"James?" she asked, less certain than before.

"Yeah," he agreed. "I'll help you."

* * *

A/N: Now the real fun begins! Unfortunately, I'll be away for a few days (yay midterms). But I can promise that you will see Snape, Dumbledore, and at least one Order member not related to Hogwarts :D 


	5. Testing 1, 2, 3

A/N: So I squeezed in one last chapter before midterms...Enjoy!

* * *

Lily nervously approached the group she had spent the last six years avoiding. Had James told them about their arrangement? Did they even want her there? Or would they shun her too? They were clustered around the desks in the back of Transfiguration.

"Hey," she said, sitting at one of the desks.

They all said some form of "hi," but only James smiled. Trying not to think about it, she made a great show of pulling out her books. Someone slid in next to her. "Don't worry about them," he said, "they're not morning people."

She tried to smile at the joke, but she thought it felt more like a grimace. How had she gotten into this mess? What had she been thinking of?

A loud slam to her right made her jump. Sirius had dropped his books onto the desk next to theirs. "Welcome to the club," he said. "You need a nickname though. Anyone have any ideas?"

Remus sat down behind Lily and James, but avoided her gaze. Peter sat down next to him. "How about a squirrel?"

"A squirrel?" Sirius looked at him like he was crazy.

"Hey, I'm the only small one, I thought we could even the numbers."

"No, it has to be something clever," said James. "What's your Patronus? Since you don't turn into an animal every day."

"Um…a fox," she said, wondering what they'd come up with.

"There, that's kind of small," Sirius told Peter. "Vixen?" he suggested with a smirk.

"Hey!" she protested over their laughter. "I don't want to be called a vixen!"

"That's what a female fox is. You got anything better?"

"Good morning, class," said Professor McGonagall. "Take out your wands. Today we will be turning objects into animals." She began to hand out various items.

"But –" Lily started.

"Come on, Vixen, take out your wand," Sirius ordered her. The others snickered, including James.

"Oh who's side are you on?" she asked him, but couldn't help smiling herself. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

* * *

After classes, they wandered outside and headed for the lake. Lily noticed that Remus was hanging back. He hadn't joined in many of the conversations between classes, and especially didn't want to talk to her. Was he sore that she was joining the group?

She dropped back until they were walking next to each other. "You okay?" she asked.

He seemed startled by her presence. "Yeah. Why?"

"I just think that you haven't been yourself lately." She paused when he flinched. "You want to talk about it?"

Remus shook his head. She bit her lip, but knew she couldn't force him to talk. "Well, I'm always here to help, you know," she said, resting a hand on his shoulder for a second.

His head snapped up in surprise. "You –" he started. She tilted her head, waiting for him to continue. "You're not – afraid of me, you don't – hate me?"

"Why would I hate you?" she asked kindly.

"Because I'm…I'm a…" he choked on the words.

She laughed, half sadly and half in relief. "Is that what this is about? You're still the same old Remus. You just have a…problem that you have to deal with once a month, which is similar to girls, I guess," she realized.

Now he laughed, hesitantly, nervously. "Yeah, I guess."

"Come on," she said, and pulled him back to the rest of the group as they settled under their usual tree.

They spent the rest of the afternoon under the tree, telling jokes and stories. As the hours passed, she began to relax, eventually leaning slightly against James. She felt like a real part of the group, even though she still didn't like her nickname.

When it was time for dinner, they headed back inside. As they entered the Great Hall, Lily spotted her friends. They noticed her too, and she could tell from their expressions that they couldn't believe what they were seeing. "I'll be right there," she told James and the others. James seemed reluctant to leave her, but Sirius pushed him toward the far end of the Gryffindor table.

She walked up to her friends, who were positively glaring at her. "Heard some rumors," one of them said. "Looks like they're true after all."

"Do you have a problem with that?" she asked.

"Potter's the plague of the school," another one said. "You really think you're good enough for him?"

Lily bristled. "What's that supposed to mean?" she demanded.

"Why are you doing this?" the first one asked. "To make us jealous?" She laughed. "Not even you would stoop that low."

Lily turned on her heel and tore down the aisle. James jumped up to meet her. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," she said before throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him. She could tell he was surprised (who wouldn't be?) but he recovered fairly quickly, kissing her back with even more intensity.

Just as she was beginning to enjoy this kiss, he pulled away. She thought she saw a trace of hurt in his eyes, but it was so fast she must have imagined it. She took the opportunity to twist around and smile mockingly to her friends. Then she noticed that nearly everyone in the Great Hall was staring at her and James.

Embarrassed, she smiled and sat down at the table, but refused to look any of the others in the eye. Although the rest of the Great Hall was breaking out into conversation again, their section of the table remained silent for several more awkward minutes.

Sirius finally put into words what they were all thinking: "Wow."

* * *

A/N: Oh, if anyone has a good permanent nickname for Lily, now is the time to suggest it! If no one comes up with anything, I'll have to think of something, and it will be horrible. Have a good weekend! 


	6. Practice

A/N: Just a few quick words: Davey Gudgeon! hahaha I had to put him in. And I forgot about Hagrid, so he'll be in the next chapter, along with the Order member. Snape and Dumbledore will be in the last chapter. And then that's it! Enjoy!

* * *

"Welcome to the first Quidditch match of the year!" said Davey Gudgeon over the megaphone. "Gryffindor vs. Ravenclaw!" Cheers erupted from the stands as the teams swooped out.

James flew out to the center of the pitch. He scanned the crowd, and easily spotted his friends. They were the ones shooting red and gold sparks into the air. The only difference was that Lily was there as well, jumping up and down and shouting encouragements.

He did a loop-de-loop to settle his nerves. He couldn't stop thinking about that kiss. He knew he was in for it. No matter how many times he reminded himself that it wasn't real, a small voice in his head protested that she must have _some _feelings for him.

Madam Hooch had released the bludgers and snitch, and he ordered himself to pay attention. She threw the quaffle. He leaned forward, dodged the Ravenclaw captain, grabbed the quaffle, and raced toward the goal posts.

He passed the quaffle to the new Chaser, the one with the name he could never seem to remember. Whoever-it-was scored through the left hoop, and the stands exploded with cheers again.

If he listened carefully, he could swear that he heard Lily's shouts above the rest.

A bludger shot past his arm, and he pulled back. He glared at the Ravenclaw Beater. His aim was poor. He needed to practice.

That's it! he realized, before tearing down the pitch.

* * *

Gryffindor was celebrating their victory in the common room, but James wasn't in the mood. He kept watching Lily, trying to figure out the best time to put his plan into action. She was laughing at some joke Sirius had said, butterbeer in one hand, the other moving as she talked.

"Are we losing you?" asked Peter, waving a pudgy hand in front of James' face. He started, and looked around guiltily. Then decided it was now or never.

"I'm just a little tired," he said. "Quidditch isn't as easy as it looks, you know." He put his own butterbeer down on the table. "G'night," he said, but at the last second, when he was about to pass Lily, he winked. She looked confused.

The others laughed. Sirius had probably made some joke at his expense, but he'd missed it. He smiled anyway, just in case, as he headed up the stairs.

The door had just closed behind him, and he was just settling on his bed, when he heard the footsteps on the stone steps. There was a knock, and then the door was pushed open. Lily stuck her head in, checked to make sure they were alone, then slid in and closed the door.

"What was that?" she asked, not nicely.

"What was what?" he asked, making a big show of cleaning his area of the room.

"You winked at me," she accused.

"I had something in my eye."

"Don't lie to me, James Potter." She took a step forward into the room, but started to giggle. "Oh, I give up," she said, crossing over to him. "What do you want?"

"You do realize, that if you go on acting like this, no one will ever believe that we're dating."

She reddened slightly. "Of course they will…"

"I don't see why not," he replied, dumping several books into his trunk. "We don't act like any of the other couples, snogging in the hallways at all hours."

"We're just more mature," she said, but unsure of it herself. The look he gave her confirmed this. She sighed. "Fine. We can kiss some more. But just enough to be convincing."

He hesitated dramatically, giving the pause the length it deserved. "That's not good enough."

"What do you mean?" she asked suspiciously.

He sighed, trying to find the best way to explain this. "We've been 'going out' for, what, a month now?"

"Three weeks," she corrected, reddening again.

"Three weeks," he agreed. "People assume that we've been kissing all along, but we haven't. We've only kissed once. And now that we're thinking about filling up some kissing quotas, we're going to find each one more awkward than the last. And that's not exactly appealing."

She waited for him to continue. When he didn't, she said, "So I guess you have an answer for that as well?"

He nodded, his eyes never leaving hers. "Practice kissing."

She laughed. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me: practice kissing. We practice, we get more comfortable with the situation, when we kiss for real, in public, no one will think that we think that it's awkward, because it won't be." He took a step closer.

"This is possibly the craziest idea you've ever come up with," she protested.

"Do you have a better one?" He took another step, until he was only a few inches from her.

She considered this. James knew how far-fetched it sounded. It made sense, logically, but not if you thought about it for too long. He didn't want to give her the time to think about it for too long.

"So?"

In answer, Lily grinned, and closed the gap between them. This time James started the kiss, keeping it slow and gentle, even though he really didn't want to.

But he didn't have to wait long before she sped things up. They even moved toward the bed and fell into it.

"I'd say get a room," said an amused voice from the doorway. They sprang apart and stared at Sirius, who was leaning on the doorframe. "But it looks like you've already found one," he finished. He went over to his bed and dug out some candy.

"It's not…" sputtered Lily. "We were just…p-practicing…"

Sirius smiled. "Of course you were," he said. "I'll just lock this for you, shall I?" he added, and closed the door.

Lily and James stared at each other in shock, then laughed for a long time. Practice was over.


	7. Hogsmeade Visit

The next weekend was a Hogsmeade weekend, and they all agreed to have lunch together before going their separate ways. Since it was such a nice day, especially for October, they decided to eat outside. But when they entered the Three Broomsticks to get their meals, they saw a familiar moleskin coat.

"Hey Hagrid," the boys called. The Keeper of Keys and Grounds at Hogwarts turned around in surprise.

"Ah, it's good ta see yeh again," he said, picking up a large mug from the counter.

James pulled Lily forward. "Look who we brought with us," he said with a grin.

"Lily Evans!" Hagrid boomed. "What're yeh doin' with this lot, then?"

"We're teaching her the finer points of pranking," said Sirius in a bored voice.

"So where have you been, Hagrid?" asked Peter as the others made their orders. "We haven't seen you for a couple of weeks."

"Ah, tha's a secret," he growled.

"C'mon Hagrid, you can tell us," James wheedled. But Hagrid just shook his head.

"Git on with yeh," he said, reddening beneath his beard. "I'm no' abou' ta tell yeh in here."

"All right, we'll go," said Sirius, "but just because our food is here. And we expect a full report this afternoon."

They took their lunches and headed for the fountain square near the outskirts of town.

"What do you think he was doing?" Remus asked.

"Probably something to help the Order," Sirius suggested. "I wish they'd let us in. We're of age. We could take on those Death Eaters." He pulled out his wand and pretended to curse Peter, who dodged clumsily and spilled half of his drink.

"Sounds dangerous," said Lily. She was fascinated by the Order of the Phoenix, a new group established to fight Voldemort and his forces. Somehow, probably through Hagrid, James and the others had access to information on the Order and were planning on joining after school, if not before.

"It is," he agreed. "But it would be worth it just to be able to do something." They arranged themselves on the fountain's edge, and Lily found herself between James and Remus. She looked around, noting how busy the square was. It was mostly filled with people shopping, but there was a small group of kids playing beyond the fence that separated Hogsmeade from the hills.

She suddenly realized how hungry she was and took a huge bite out of her sandwich. She was quite content to eat and listen to the conversation on her right between James, Sirius, and Peter on the Order. But she soon found this annoying, because any time her thoughts strayed to the idea of James risking his life in the Order, her throat tightened up and she couldn't swallow her delicious sandwich.

She took a gulp from her drink to return her throat to normal and turned to Remus, who was staring off into the distance. Concerned, she followed his gaze until she saw the little kids. They seemed to be playing some form of hide-and-seek.

The four-year-old girl that Remus was watching was crouched in the green-brown grass, beaming as she watched the other children running back and forth. Lily had to do a double take, her eyes widening as she realized what she was seeing. The girl's hair was the exact color of the grass!

"Oh, how adorable," Lily whispered.

Suddenly, the girl jumped up and raced for the other side of the fountain. Her braided hair turned stone grey as she hid behind the fountain. The others spotted her and chased after her. The girl shrieked and circled the fountain, laughing at the others.

She tripped on her skirt and crashed into Remus, who laughed as he helped her up. She grinned a gap-toothed smile at him, her hair turning bright purple, and then she was off again.

"Did you see that?" she asked James.

"Why, you want to adopt her?"

She lightly punched his arm. "No, of course not."

"Well," said Sirius as he stood up. "I'm off to Zonko's. Need anything?"

"Yeah, hold on." James fished a piece of parchment out of his pocket.

"I think I'll stop by Honeydukes," said Peter.

"You just had lunch!" Lily exclaimed.

"So?"

"Where are you going Remus?" asked James.

"I don't know," he said. "I might pick up some supplies."

The boys split off on their own, leaving Lily and James on the fountain.

"So where are _we _going?" James asked her.

Lily shrugged. "Let's just start walking." They started down the street.

"There's always Madam Puddifoot's," James suggested as they passed the tea shop.

Lily made a disgusted face. "Or not."

He laughed. "Oh good, I was hoping you'd say that."

They spent the rest of the afternoon wandering around, browsing in the stores or just watching everyone else shop. Lily found herself watching James out of the corner of her eye more than she was watching anything else. She laughed more that afternoon than she had in a long time. And as the doubts began to creep into her mind, she hurriedly tried to squash them.

He's just a friend, she repeated to herself. Nothing more, nothing less. It doesn't matter if you kissed, it's not even real. He's just helping you out of a jam. He's just a friend.

And when that didn't work, she started to panic.

You can't be in love with him, she ordered herself. You just can't. I won't let you.

But then she'd meet his brown eyes and forget her commands completely.

"Oh no," said James under his breath. He was looking down a side street. She looked too, but only saw Snape walking toward them. He wasn't even paying attention to them, but was engrossed in a book.

"James, don't," she warned, gripping his arm. "He's not doing anything, leave him alone." The look in his eyes scared her. _This_ is why you can't love him, she told herself. He's _not_ a good person. And that thought made her crumble inside.

She could see him make his decision. He tried to force a smile. "Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt him." But she could feel him tensing.

Snape looked up as he turned the page. He saw James, and reached for his wand, but James had his out first. "Don't you dare," James growled.

"James, stop it!" she cried, trying to pull his wand arm down.

"Stay out of this, Mudblood," Snape spat, never taking his eyes off his enemy's wand.

"You take that back!" James roared.

Snape shot off a curse, not at James, but at Lily. She could only watch in shock as a spatter of purple flames sped toward her. James stepped in front of her and used the Shield Charm. The spell pushed them backward, but otherwise faded away harmlessly, and Snape had slipped down another side street.

"You all right?" he asked.

She could only nod.

He glared at where Snape had stood. "I'll kill him," he said in a low voice. "That was definitely a dark arts spell and I swear, I'll kill him."

"No," she said, suddenly unable to breathe at what he was saying. "He was just defending himself."

"No, _I_ was defending myself, and you," James argued.

"You didn't attack him," she realized. "You didn't fight back."

He shook his head. "I could never live with myself if someone hurt you," he said, almost in a whisper. "You're far more important to me than some stupid street fight."

Now she really couldn't breathe. Because she felt exactly the same way.

* * *

A/N: (Just to clarify: Snape used the same spell as the Death Eater who attacked Hermione in the Dept. of Mysteries.)

Awwww I love Tonks! I just had to put her in, but in a way that Remus would never remember seeing her. And if anyone bothers to ask, no Andromeda Black/Tonks was not there, it was Tonks' dad (in the background and unmentioned), so no, Sirius would not have recognized anything about her.


	8. The Final Piece

James leaned against the wall outside the N.E.W.T. potions class. He was hungry, and couldn't wait for the feast to begin. Sirius and the others were saving him a seat while he met up with Lily.

He frowned. He had thought they had been getting on so well, but lately she seemed to be distancing herself from him. He figured it was his own fault for taking advantage of her when she was asking him for help. Of course she'd want to put a wall back up between them.

Sixth and seventh years started to filter out of the classroom. James pushed off from the wall, searching the group for the familiar sheen of red hair and bright green eyes. Then he looked again. Where was she?

The students were down the hall, and Lily still hadn't emerged. Suspicious, he ducked into the classroom. The air was filled with a blue smoke from today's lesson. All of the seats were empty except for one.

Snape was scribbling frantically in his potions book, occasionally stirring the contents of his cauldron.

"Go away, Potter," he snapped. "I'm busy."

James bit back an angry retort. "Where's –"

"She didn't show up today," he interrupted. "Now go away."

He tightened his hold on his wand, but refused to say anything. He stormed out, nearly bowling over Professor Slughorn. "Oh, hello Jared," Slughorn called after him.

It wasn't like Lily to skip class, he thought as he raced up the steps to Gryffindor tower. Something was wrong.

He stopped at the bottom of the stairs leading to the girl dormitories. He knew from experience that one step would trigger the stone slide to prevent him from getting up there. He backed up as far as he could, took a deep breath, and ran as fast as he could.

The shifting stone threw him off balance, but he charged on. He leaped onto the seventh-years doorstep, which at least remained level, and pounded on the door.

"Lily!" he shouted. "Open up!" He slipped, but caught himself. "Lily!"

The door opened, but it was one of Lily's old friends. "She's not here," she said. James pushed past her, only to confirm her statement with his own eyes.

"Where is she?" he demanded.

"She doesn't want to talk to you," she said, crossing her arms. "Now get out, I'm late for the feast."

"Where is she?"

But she just pointed out the door. He glared, but left.

By the time he rejoined Sirius and the others in the Great Hall, nearly all of the students were eating. "I can't find her," he told them, and filled them in on what had happened. The enchanted ceiling showed the darkening clouds that were gathering overhead.

"Well, if she's avoiding you, mate, there's not much you can do," said Sirius.

"Looks like the charade's over," Remus added.

"Here, have a pasty." Peter shoved a handful onto his plate, but James had lost his appetite.

A green light reflected off the clouds, and several students screamed. Suddenly everyone was in motion, running for the windows or the Entrance Hall. James and Sirius pushed their way to the front of the crowd on the steps and looked for the source of the light.

"The Dark Mark," said Sirius grimly. It was clearly visible now, hovering over the treeline, somewhere above Hogsmeade. It glittered against the grey-green clouds, and the serpent-tongue slowly circled the skull.

"Everyone back to their dormitories," Dumbledore ordered from behind them. As they went by him to go inside, he said, "James, come here a minute."

James waved his friends through the doors. "Now," said Dumbledore, "I want you and –" he stopped, puzzled. "Where's Lily?"

"I'll find her, sir," James assured him. "What do you want us to do?"

"Patrol the halls with the other teachers, make sure all of the students are safe in their dormitories." He turned and headed down the steps, where McGonagall and Flitwick were waiting for him.

"What are you going to do, sir?" he asked before he could stop himself.

Dumbledore smiled. "Make sure you give the message to Lily." And then they were setting off for Hogsmeade.

James checked to make sure that the other students had gone inside before reentering the castle and allowing Slughorn to bar the doors. As he expected, his friends were waiting just inside. He explained what had happened. "So I need to find Lily," he finished.

Sirius took the Marauders' Map out of a pocket. "Here," he said, but James shook his head.

"I know where to find her. I'll catch up with you later." He slipped out the front doors, noticing that it had started to rain, and headed for the lake. Specifically for their usual tree.

And there she was, gazing out across the lake, which was reflecting the green light from the clouds. She must have heard him approach, but she didn't move or acknowledge him in any way. Sighing inwardly, he draped his cloak over her shoulders and sat down against the tree.

"I'm already wet," she finally said quietly, but wrapped the cloak tighter around her.

"It's better than nothing," he said at the same volume.

They were silent for a few more minutes as they watched the green light on the clouds and water. James suppressed a shudder. It was eerie.

"They want me back," she said without turning around. He didn't ask who they were.

"That's what you wanted isn't it?" he asked, trying to ignore his writhing insides.

"Yes. No. I don't know," she admitted. She hesitated. "I can't do this."

"Do what?"

"This." She sniffed as she looked over her shoulder. "You…I can't…"

He nodded. He understood. She didn't need his help anymore. She didn't want to see him anymore. She was breaking up with him.

James couldn't bear sitting here anymore. He started to get up, but she cried, "No!" and shifted closer.

"What?" he asked, failing to keep the bitterness out of his voice.

"I can't…not see you again." He settled back against the tree, amazed at what he was hearing. "I can't…not be with you." She moved closer, until she was sitting across from him.

"Lily," he protested.

"Please don't leave," she pleaded, her voice almost inaudible beneath the rain.

"I'm not going to," he said, and waved for her to sit next to him. She scrambled over and leaned against him.

They watched in silence as the reflected green light wavered all around them.

"I love you," she whispered.

He looked down in surprise, but she was watching the light. "I love you, too," he said, not embarrassed in the slightest. He let the silence stretch on for another minute before telling her that they were needed back at the castle. She nodded reluctantly, and they walked back hand in hand, finding comfort in the nearness of the other.

Before they went inside, they stole one last glance at the Dark Mark, which was beginning to dissipate over Hogsmeade.

"Some Halloween, eh?" he asked with a smile.

* * *

A/N: Huh. That didn't turn out the way I'd thought it would. I'm not exactly a fan of mushy stuff. Ah well. Hope you enjoyed it! Have a novel day! 


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